How to Trick a Stripper Into Thinking You Respect Her, so She Will Have Sex With You

Today I read something bad... really bad. First I was astonished by the stupidity of it, then I felt disgusted (especially after I read the comments people had left), and then finally I felt really angry. 

So, to start at the beginning, I was browsing the web (as ya do) and I came across an article written on a website called 'brobible.com'. Yes. I know what you're thinking. I should have clicked away, there and then, seeing as this site arguably has the douchiest name on the internet. However, I kept reading, as the title of this article really caught my eye:

"How to Have Sex With a Stripper (Without Paying For it) by Alex Matlock"

What follows on from there is literally one of the creepiest pieces of 'journalism' I have ever read. This guy claims he is a Pick Up Artist (or PUA for all those in da know). So basically he schools guys on how to get women, or 'chicks' as he so adorably puts it throughout the article. (Seriously though, I find 'chicks' such a weird term for women. Is he stuck in a Freddie Prinze Jr movie?? Ima start calling guys 'roosters' or something to get a balance).

Anyway I am going to walk you through this abomination of an article. 

So here we go. 

First of all Matlock writes that you have to 'look decent' to have the stripper want to sleep with you... No shit Sherlock. He then claims that because he's 'fit and dresses well [he] didn't get to see what happened if that wasn't the case.' From looking at his picture I'm personally not seeing the fitness or dress sense, but whatevs, you managed to trick the stripper into sleeping with you, so well done you, what do I know??!11!

What follows from here is a web of LIESSS that allow Matlock to ensnare his prey.

 You have to trick the bar staff into telling you who is the youngest and newest stripper, and as Alex so delightfully puts it:

'As soon as you've got that [information], you've got you potential prospect. Now the chase begins.'

I swear this guy thinks he's a freakin sex lion or something.

The creepiest bit comes when he's writing about what to say during conversation with her. I don't think there is a person on earth who could talk about women in a more demeaning way than this guy. He keeps mentioning:

 'strippers are like normal women, thus you need to game them like any other chick'.

Arghhh too many things wrong with this sentence!!

1) Chick (see above)

2) 'Strippers are like normal women'. WTF?? They are women! They have likes and dislikes, they eat at the same restaurants as us, they breathe the same air!!! And, btw, I would really like to know what a 'normal' woman is.

3) 'Game them'.  Ewwww, seriously man? That sounds so creepy.

Matlock then continues to perpetuate the idea that strippers are like some weird animal you have pretend you respect to get them to sleep with you, by writing such gems as:

'Contrary to popular belief, you're probably not going to get the bang that first night. The best thing to do is continue treating her like any other woman.'

She is a human being! Yeah, well done!! So you're right, maybe treating her with respect might get you somewhere?! 

And just for a second can we all commemorate the douche-beauty of Matlock's phrase 'The Bang'. (Which he mentions a total of six times in the article).

Matlock lives for 'The Bang' you guys. It's his life. His love. He lives for the chase. The wind in his hair...

He doesn't give a shit about the actual girl. Tbh from this article it kinda shows that he pretty much has no respect for any women. Women's pussy is the prize to be won. After all, he does entitle it 'The Game'. And to him, it seems, strippers are at the bottom of the (already low) women section of the human hierarchy. They aren't 'normal women', but you have to 'game' them into thinking they are. 

This man freakin spends money, goes on dates, messes with people's emotions, to get them to fuck him. Once. How sad do you literally have to be to do this?

He claims he 'seduced' a stripper as an experiment, in order to write this article. That is low. Really low.

 And the lack of self esteem this guy must have, in order to get himself to do this kind of stuff, must be incredible.

I can't stress enough that I understand that you don't have to reallly like, or wanna be with someone, in order to sleep with them. But to  undermine their confidence and trick them into sleeping with you, is something else. I don't have to love someone to sleep with them, but I still have basic human respect for them!

If you ask a Pick Up Artist why they act like sad, pathetic leeches in order to sleep with girls, their go-to answer is usually that they are doing it to help all the guys that can't talk to girls and who always get turned down. This is complete bullshit. Pretending to admire someones intelligence, pandering to their ego and creating elaborate schemes just to sleep with them, is not a way to get guys to create healthy, happy relationships with girls. It's a way to fuck someone over and feel better about your pathetic self by doing it.  

Scrolling down the comments I also found a lovely comment by a guy called Sean Reed, who wrote:

'Many years ago I had a stripper girlfriend. The key is to flip the script and have to attitude that she is lucky to be with you. Most strippers are f'ed up in the head... Unfortunately, most have an attitude... and are 100% unsuitable for any type of meaningful relationship. Once you understand that it is easy to game them.'

Right so did you get that guys? Flip it so you can mind fuck her, and control her properly. If she's emotionally unstable even better! You'll be able to 'game' her better then!! amirighhtt??!

Tbh I don't really know what I expected from a guy who wrote other articles with titles such as:

How Soon Will She Let You Bang Her?

8 Simple Steps to Bang Chicks While Day Drinking

How to GET Your Girlfriend to have a Threesome (...I wish I were joking. He even capitalised the 'get')

anddddd

A Guy's Guide to Getting and Keeping a Mistress 

... okay that's it. I'm done. This guy.. wow.

You know what Matlock. You wanna have good sex with someone? Maybe actually try being yourself and treating them with respect. You will experience what amazing sex actually is.

 And funnily enough, it doesn't come with that sick feeling you get in your stomach every time, knowing that they wouldn't be fucking you if they knew what a pathetic person you are to have to scheme and lie to get into that situation in the first place. Just a thought.

Here's the stripper article for all of you interested :)

xxx

The Strange Case of The Secret Leg Fetishist

Well this blog post is quite personal this week; as it is on the subject of something that actually happened to me. It is the strange tale of the secret leg fetishist...

It all started with my Lookbook account (shameless plug.. I know). Lookbook is a website where aspiring fashionistas upload outfits, or 'looks', styled by themselves, and people like and comment on them. I am one of these pretentious people, and I like uploading my own looks from time to time. Having uploaded a recent look, I sat back and watched the likes and comments roll in ( all 12 of them). 

I then noticed an email pop up in my Lookbook inbox. At first I thought it was spam, but on closer inspection i saw it was a genuine email. 

It was from someone named Louie. I won't write his second name, as he is quite easy to find on Facebook. He claimed he was a photographer who primarily took photos for hosiery companies, such as Tabio and Wolford, for their blogs. Having seen and liked my Lookbook page, he asked whether I would like to do a test shoot for him in London. I was naturally very skeptical about this, so I asked to see some of his previous work, portfolios etc, and asked what agencies/companies he has previously worked for.

He replied almost straight away, and I found his eagerness added to my skepticism a little. In response to me wanting to see his previous work, he linked me to this:

So obviously I was thinking... ummm okay? A random tights website is a portfolio of your previous work? Hmmm.
The previous agency he claimed he worked with was One Photographic, which seemed legit enough as they are a real company.

But then he made a mistake.

  

I'm not sure if it was necessarily something any normal Lookbooker would be able to spot, or if I am so versed in the seedy side of sexuality that I noticed it straight away, but he casually wrote:

"In the test shoot you'll be provided with 15 denier, reinforced toe tights for Tabio, and the test shoot will be outside. Do you usually wear tights etc, if so which types?".

No photographer ever needs to know, for photographic reasons or whatever, what tights or hosiery their model usually likes to wear. Foot and leg fetishists, however, would loooovveee to know what hosiery I am usually keen on wearing. He already had photos of me from the Lookbook website (legs included), so having some personal info on what my hosiery preferences were, would just add to the fantasy.  

I decided to ring the One Photographic agency. The receptionist immediately forwarded me to the company director. She was really lovely, and did all she could to help me with my strange request. I asked her if anyone with his name had ever worked with her agency. She confirmed that no one ever had, and that no one had even interned with that name either. She concluded that he must be a weirdo, and to definitely stay far away.

Now back to ol' Louie. I was pretty much 99% sure he was a foot/leg fetishist, but I wanted to have one final dig in his online info to see if I could find something that would seal the deal. I found his Facebook page, which conceded that he was indeed a part-time photographer based in London.
However, I also found a very interesting section on his Lookbook page.

I hadn't realised, until that moment, that you can see Lookbooker's comments to other Lookbooker's, on their outfits. Louie's comments page was filled with comments to girls, who all had one thing in common:

They were all wearing 15 denier black tights.

This guy was mmaddddd about 15 denier, black, reinforced toe, tights. Here's a little sample of the stuff he'd written on these girl's looks:

"Hey love those tights! They're 15 denier right?"

"Amazing tights!"

"Do those tights have a reinforced toe? Love the cute look!"

"These tights look great. So nice"

The thing is, on most of these looks, the tights really weren't the main focus of the outfit. They just happened to be wearing tights at the time. In a lot of them the tights were barely even visible! 

And have a guess at what I was wearing in my Lookbook outfit, when Louie stumbled across me?

You guessed it!

Now here's my problem. I don't know how to feel about the whole situation really. I love fetishes, I find them really fascinating. But conning someone into letting you take pictures of their legs, so you can masturbate over them later, is a bit deceiving and mean.

 However, in this world of stigmatism in relation to fetishes, maybe he couldn't find someone to adhere to his needs. I'm not going to lie, I do find foot fetishes really weird; literally more than any other fetish. I can understand a leg fetish, but only if stockings were involved. Not some boring, everyday, see-through tights!
People told me I should report him etc, but I really didn't think that was necessary. I mean 1) who to??! and 2) if the guy really wants to masturbate over some legs, let him. If he was trying to rape people, or engage in non-consensual sexual behavior with the girls he was photographing, then yes of course, get very mad.

But for me personally, I can't really make myself angry with the situation. I just think it a funny tale, that fits nicely into the collection of other strange stories that make up my life. 

Louie was blocked and deleted from Lookbook straight after his last email to me. So I suppose he'll have to find a new 15 denier, reinforced toe'd, leg-pool to masturbate over.

xxx

Fatima Siad: Female Circumcision (AKA Horrific Genital Mutilation For Women) and The Lifelong Sexual Punishment

Soooo, today I'm going to be discussing a topic that involves something so awful, it defies the amount of pain my brain can even handle processing. It also involves the most beautiful model I have ever laid eyes on. That model in question is the one looking coquettishly over her shoulder in the picture above this text; the beautiful Fatima Siad. 

Born in Somalia, Fatima was subject to an experience many young African girls face; circumcision. This process involves the cutting out of the clitoris and labia minora and sewing up of the labia majora. There are three stages to the female circumcision, as shown in this diagram:

The level of pain this procedure must produce, is completely mind blowing to me. But then the fact that it is actually practiced on baby girls who are just A FEW DAYS OLD is just... well I have no words. This procedure is usually carried out with a pair of scissors and NO ANESTHESIA. I know. I mean the scissors part is horrific, but then no pain relief??? 

The dangers of snipping off a little girl's clitoris and labia, and then sewing her vaginal lips together, is not actually what this blog post is going to be about, however. The main concerns I have lie in the fact that these girls are denied sexual freedom. Actually, if you dig deeper, it's not even that they are denied sexual freedom, they are denied the human right of even being a sexual being in the first place. 

Unless you are asexual, having sex and feeling pleasure is not a preference, it's a basic human need, like eating or drinking. Not many people could actually say "No mannn, seriously I hate orgasms.. actually I hate pleasure in general!". No. It just wouldn't happen. (Unless you're asexual... keep that in mind with everything I'm writing in this post!). 

Every person on this planet is entitled to feeling pleasure from sex. Considering that only 25% of woman can orgasm through vaginal stimulation alone, it would show that people performing female circumcision on girls, are imprisoning them in an orgasm-less existence. 

Why people seem to get so squeamish and weird about the thought of women liking sex is completely beyond me. It's like society has been brainwashed into thinking that women always have to be the clear-thinkers. God forbid they let themselves go for a few minutes into the evil grasps of pleasure?!? But this mindset then takes a frightening turn when it morphs itself into blind fear. A father or mother may become overcome with disgust when thinking that their little daughter may, at some point, discover pleasure through their own body and through sex. It frightens them so deeply, that their crazy thought processes lead them to the answer that "Yes, the best thing to do is to just not let them EVER experience it, then they'll never know, and thus will stay pure and I can go to bed and night, safe in the knowledge that they'll never touch themselves. Yayyyy! Win-win situation!".

Mutilating another person's body, especially a child's, all in the name of anti-sex and anti-pleasure takes human craziness to a whole new level for me. Through all the pictures I have posted above, you can see that Fatima Siad is not ashamed to convey her sexuality and beauty through her photographs. Although she hasn't said to what level she has been circumcised, any type of genital mutilation is damaging to a girl's mind and soul.

Siad was able to leave Somalia, come to America, and celebrate her beauty through modeling. But for most little girls around the world; in Africa, Malaysia, and other Islamic countries, they are imprisoned into a life that firmly says "No. You are not entitled to feel pleasure. You are dirty for having the desire to want to feel it. You should feel ashamed for being born a woman, and I will take it upon myself to seal you into this fate by permanently mutilating your body while you are too weak to fight me." 

Although this is an extreme example of hate towards female sexuality, it happens in our own 'liberal' western world; through slut shaming and by setting a quota on how much sex a woman can have before she is labelled a whore. (You can read my post on Whores, Sluts and Hoes after you've read this)

There is an easy and simple statement that, if the world could just accept and embrace it, would end a lot of women's pain; physically, in terms of female mutilation, and mentally, in terms of self-harm and sometimes eventually suicide. And the statement is this:
"Women have sex, they like to feel pleasure. Ffs just get over it."

The End.

xxx